


Things That Need To Be Said

by roguelightning



Category: Sanctuary (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-26
Updated: 2018-10-26
Packaged: 2019-08-08 02:08:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16420340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roguelightning/pseuds/roguelightning
Summary: Episode tag for Trail Of Blood. After leaving the cave, Nikola feels the need to clarify why the Source Blood is so important to him.





	Things That Need To Be Said

**Author's Note:**

> Day 2 of Teslen appreciation week. Prompt was Tears, and the thing with me is that I can't exactly do angst sadly so yeah this got a bit away from me? Sorry not sorry

By the time he picks up the courage to speak, they’re way ahead of the others, the cave they left barely visible from where they are. It dawns on him that maybe the kids were considerate enough for once to give them space, but he dismisses that idea quickly. They’re not that nice to him, especially that little bugger who kept insisting he couldn’t be trusted. Though in light of recent events, he can’t help thinking that maybe the kid was right after all.

“Listen, Helen, about the Source Blood thing…” he starts, his voice a bit hesitant. This stops her in her tracks, and for a second he thinks she’s going to turn around and yell at him.

“Forget it.” she dismisses him as she picks up the pace, her voice tinged with something he can’t quite place. He hopes to God it’s not hate, though, because the idea of that scares him more than death itself.

“I know, I should have told you I was planning to retrieve it, but-“

“But you thought I was going to stop you.”

“Was I wrong?” he challenges, something suddenly stirring up inside him. “You’ve always seen it as a curse, Helen, but to me it was a blessing. It just… opened up so many possibilities for me.”

“Right, giving you the chance to reconnect with your ancestors and all that. We’ve had this talk before, Nikola.”

“And we had it before… events, I know. And I can see why you hate it even more now, after it… well, you know.”

“After my daughter died because of it, you mean?” she shots him a dark grin at that, before shaking her head. “You think this is why I hate the Source Blood, because I think it killed my daughter?”

“Well, yes.”

“Oh, no. I’m afraid that one is entirely on me.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. What happened to Ashley is on the Cabal alone.”

“Is that so?” she asks, her voice raised now. “Who had the brilliant idea to do some experiments on herself and on her colleagues, without a single idea of what was going to happen? Who was the one who got pregnant with a serial killer and decided to carry the child to term anyway, not worrying for a second what might become of her had certain genes be awoken? And, most importantly-“ she said as she struggled to keep her voice from trembling – “who was the one that got her into this life, the one who taught her to love the Sanctuary more than anything else in the world, to even die for it if the situation called for that? Not to mention I was the one who guilt tripped her to sacrifice herself in the end.” It’s with this phrase that she finally breaks down in tears, causing him to rush to her and take her in his arms.

“Ashley was an amazing young woman.” he agrees as he presses her to his chest, his hand drawing small circles on her back. “And you are right about one thing, if she got the self sacrifice from someone that was you. Not the Source Blood, and heaven knows not Druitt. But you also need to understand that she got your stubbornness too, you know. She found a way to save the Sanctuary and she used it.”

“What if I don’t want people sacrificing for me anymore? Or for the Sanctuary, for that matter. I’ve had enough, Nikola.” she says, her body still shaking from the sobs. “First, it was James who came on that trip to retrieve the Source Blood despite knowing his machinery could have failed him, then Ashley, and now you-“

“Me?”

“I almost thought I lost you today, Nikola.” she clings tighter to him at that, the memory of him clsing the door behind her still vivid in her mind.

“I wasn’t going to let you die because something stupid I did.”

“And you thought that dying and letting me deal with the aftermath of that was preferable?”

“Oh come on, I had a plan of getting away. Genius, remember?”

“You keep reminding me that, yes.”

“What if I promise you I’ll tell you next time I try anything funny?”

“I’ve known you for more than one hundred years, Nikola, don’t insult me by thinking I actually believe you with that. You need to let go.”

“What if I can’t?” he asks and for once there is no challenge in his voice. “What if I need it so I can be what I was destined to be?”

“And what is that? A vampire? I will admit that mortality doesn’t suit you quite as well, Nikola, but you’re still pretty amazing. You don’t need the Source Blood for that.”

“I’m going to need you to repeat that, you know.”

“No, sorry, one time thing. Don’t let it go to your head.” she says with a smile. It’s then when she realizes that she’s still in his arms and she takes a step back, her body instantly missing the contact between them. No, this is totally not something she can afford to get used to.

“You know I tried everything I could think of, Nikola.” she sighs. “I don’t want to sound arrogant here, but-“

“But if you couldn’t revamp me, then chances are nobody can.” he says with a pout. “The thought did cross my mind, yes. But I decided to take the chance anyway.”

“Is it really so important to you, being a vampire?”

“Parts of it are.”

“Don’t tell me you miss your antelope diet.”

“No no no, nothing like that. Keeping up the pace, however… not having that does hinder my plans a bit.”

“Your world domination plans, you mean? Come on, Nikola, it’s been a year, don’t tell me you didn’t come up with a plan to take over in the next 30 years or so.”

“I could have the world in less than ten years if I really wanted to, Helen. It’s other things that I want that seem to take a lot more time than I can afford at the moment.” she shoots him a glance at that, shaking her head in disbelief as she picks up the pace again. “You know, you might want to get another time estimate on that.” she mutters under her breath, despite herself.

“What was that?” he calls after her and she can’t help smiling. His vampire hearing is definitely something she doesn't miss. “I said I will need that larva from you once we get back.” she calls back.


End file.
